Kink and Sexy - Little Black Ring

by Liona Sun

Volume 9: Little Black Ring


I don’t know if any of you have noticed people wearing black rings lately.  Fashion has changed once again and Black is the new Gold or White Gold rather.  Everywhere I look you see black rings for fashion, worn as wedding rings, even healing stone rings, which I personally own.  About a year ago, I purchased a little black ring of onyx to help in my own ailments and focus.  Personally, I didn’t think anything of it sized it to my right hand ring finger for comfort and energy, then about a month ago I was approached and asked if I was apart of the “Club.”


“What Club?”  I asked utterly confused.  The man pointed to my ring.  Still baffled, I shook my head.  As he looked around I started to get a hint of what he meant.


“Aren’t you a swinger?” He whispered.


Me, in my horrible-reaction way, I pulled back from him, grew beat red and said, “No, sorry” as I giggled nervously.  As all of you know, I do not judge a person on their own lifestyle choices, but to be approached completely off guard, I wasn’t sure what else to do.  He apologized and turned on his heels quicker than I could say it was no big deal.


After my brain started working again, I felt horrible and I knew I should have handled that WAY different.  Not to mention, I realized I had missed a HUGE opportunity to ask a few of my own questions, so instead, I hit the internet and decided to do some research of my own.  I started my search with, “How to recognize a swinger” then it morphed into so many different links and websites which of course all fascinated me completely.  My handsome man always lifts an eyebrow at my latest search engine history, but he still loves me!


According to what I read there are two main beliefs of people who are swingers.  The first belief is of those who are committed to one person personally and financially, but they work off the innate instinct to “spread their seed” in many different areas to preserve their genealogical lines.  Do they actually produce children with other people, I doubt it, but the primal desire is met with the swingers club.  The most interesting thing to me was it was not just men who felt this way.  Some women believed they had to seek out the most macho or strongest guy to represent protection. 


The second belief, in the best, most general way I can decipher it as a “group” belief, is of those who are restless in their own lives.  There were hundreds of testimonies of couples who were suffering from mid-life crisis, miscommunication or non-communication or unmet expectations and seek out a way to either spice up their lives or “experience” other partners with the consent of their wife or husband in hopes to save their existing relationship or marriage.


Out of the hundreds of testimonies that I read they were all positive experiences and seemed to enrich their own passion for their partners.  Of course to any situation, there were also a handful of negative experiences that keep it in perspective.  From what I read, there are three major rules:

  1. Do not talk about it.
  2. You always go home with the one you came with.
  3. No out side relations with those in the club.


If anyone of these rules were broken, the trust begins to dwindle and the relationship falls apart at the seams without any hope of rekindling.


The major thing I noticed with each website and articles that I read was most of its content was speculation because the number one rule of the Swingers Club is, “Don’t talk about it” which I totally get.  Safety and anonymity are the most important things to people going against the grain.  Due to our societal norms, religious and moral beliefs and idea that humans are or should be a monogamous population, those who do not share this idea, have to live behind closed doors.  Does it make their lifestyle wrong?  No, that is their choice and it requires consent and like minded thinking and beliefs from all adults involved, but because it goes against what we were taught to be right, it makes some people uncomfortable to the point of hate, anger, fury and violence, which is utterly heartbreaking to me and why they choose to be silent.


From my readings, it looks as if there are some tell tale signs that someone is apart of this exclusive club.  In the 1990’s and 2000’s it started out by having flamingos in your front yard or a pineapple door knocker, but could easily be mistaken for my former boss Betty who was a tropical party girl at heart.  Over time the signs have become slightly more fashionable with “suspected” tattoos of spades on their ankles, jewelry of the male and female symbol interlinked with an extra male or female symbol attached (depending on which you prefer as the added partner), toe rings with the words: HotWife, Whore, Queen of Spades, Slut or Sissy on it and of course the method I was approached by, the black rings worn on the ring finger of traditionally, the right hand, but has progressed to either side. 


I would love to have a coffee date with someone who swings to find out more on what their story it, how it works for them and long term benefits of a shared intimate life.  Maybe one day this will happen, but for now, rules are rules and all will stay silent.


As always, I love who I am, I love what I do, and I love the products I get to share with all of you.  I am Liona Sun, Full Bloom Parties Blogger and until next time, be cool, stay safe and practice your own KINK and Sexy.


I hope you enjoy, like, comment, and keep in touch with all the up-coming blogs.  Ladies, if you’d like to be interviewed for your own KINK and Sexy article, be sure to message me either through social media or by email at and we’ll set up an interview! 


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