by Liona Sun
Volume 11: Mamas Need Love Too
In all my years of doing what I do, never have I ever cringed at the fact that my parents “do it” and may be a little kinkier than I let on. No, I do not visualize them being so intimate, but then again seeing my parents kiss in the kitchen and randomly pinch or flirt was not uncommon either. I fully understand that even though they hold that title and higher authority of “My Parents,” I know they need love and affection too. Not to mention it was a great tug on the heart strings, to see some of the things that I eventually wanted in a relationship. Plus honestly, how do you think we all came to be, that big stork in the sky? Please.
So let’s talk about what makes it so uncomfortable that our parents are intimate. Is it because your parents never talked about sex openly to you? Is it because they didn’t perform any public displays of affection (no flirting, butt smacks, or body teasing) minus the peck on the lips they gave to one another? Is it because you’ve watched too many Hollywood films that make you think your parents are already old and wrinkly in places “unmentionable.” Is it because society as a younger population gives you the illusion that people stop having sex after kids? Tell me, what is it that makes the thought of your parents happy and intimate so unbearable, sometimes to the point of isolating them? Don’t get me wrong, I don’t give my mom the play by play, but shopping for lingerie or a new toy wouldn’t be weird to me in the least.
My biological parents split up when I was little, but I was lucky that my mom found a great guy to take us kids under his wing and actually loved my mom for who she is. They would giggle and banter and go on dates and I knew that is apart of what I wanted for my own love life (I’ve seen the opposite side). I think seeing them happy is what made the thought of them intimate a no brainer. Personally, I’m grateful that my parents were playful in front of us. It showed us that you could be serious and still have fun no matter where you were. It showed us that they weren’t afraid of affection and it showed us that they weren’t embarrassed by affectionate teasing or their relationship. Being married and sex go hand in hand, right? What would happen if your partner stopped being intimate with you? Me personally, I couldn’t take it. I know that there are health issues that can prevent intimacy or even the thought of sex, but if one looses it due to boredom or lack of love, there is some serious work needed to your relationship. When my first marriage fell apart, the lack of intimacy was one of the first signs that I knew we were near our end. Does that mean it’s that way for everyone? NO, but you BOTH people have to be willing to work to fix what needs mending. Sex in a relationship is crucial, it brings you closer physically, emotionally and spiritually to one another and seals and strengthens an invisible bond. That look in their eyes after making love, the tousled hair, the breath for breath panting is something you don’t share with the whole world, and even can occasionally fix arguments. So show your partner that you love them, play and feel childish and giddy as often as you can.
As for Hollywood, tabloids, books etc., I definitely think they have a lot to do with perception. How many movies do you see about people falling in love after 50? How many movies do you see about older couples getting hot and spicy? I can think of two, and Hollywood played them off as the old crazy couple, because they were still crazy in love and intimate with each other. We write in our brain what we see, hear and experience, which becomes our perception of the world whether right or wrong and that creates a belief as to what we think should happen in life.
Let me tell you a story. Janice was in her late 50’s and her husband wanted to try to spice things up and left the shopping up to her. So she grabbed her purse and stop at the door. Where was she going to go? Does she go to the local X-rated shop to buy a new toy and lube or down to Victoria Secrets to buy some lingerie? Should she order something off line? No what if it was the wrong size or she hated it? Unfamiliar of what to do next, she decided to contact her daughter who knows a rep at Full Bloom Parties, an in-home intimate party company, that specialized in helping women awaken their inner goddess and could give her some pointers on how to best surprise her man. So her daughter sets it all up and Janice is nervous and excited because of the party, but some of her daughters friends have mentioned that they are nervous her “mom” will be there and will judge how kinky they are. Janice’s daughter has two choices here. She can buckle under peer pressure and ask Janice to order from a catalog, fueling the perception it’s a young person’s world, and in turn isolates and alienates her mother who felt lost in the beginning. OR she could tell her friends to shove it, get her mom a nice well alcoholed beverage to relax and set her in front of a table ready to be wowed by the new tricks to be played. Perception is everything, but you get to choose how to see it.
I’m not gonna lie, when I was a kid, I thought 30 was OLD and if you were older than that, you were darn near kickin the bucket, buying the farm, and resting under a blanket of dirt. Now that I am over 30, I feel like my life is just getting started. Sure your body changes and it may be harder to loose weight than you did in your 20’s, but you’re wiser about life, kinkier in the bedroom and hopefully, comfortable enough with yourself to know that life is a party and you’ve finally arrived. Be honest, do you (or did you) feel old at 30, did you feel your life was over and you should stop having fun, flirting with your partner or better yet, stop having sex completely? That life only consisted of sleeping, eating, working and slaving away for your kids… and that’s it? Okay, some of that is true, but depending on how much time allows, you can definitely get kinky any time of day at any age. Kids can make it difficult, but you put on a movie, bust out the music and play it loud if you’re a screamer and lock the door, because you’ve got to refresh that “Just Been F***ed” hairdo. Get ready for bed, but slip into your new lingerie and heels and tuck into bed for your partner to unwrap a great surprise. Send him a picture of your new toy and tease, “I wonder what this is for.” Then pray he makes it through the rest of his shift without quitting his job to come home.
Just because your parents are older than you, does not mean they stop living and having sex. Studies show that 70% of couples over 50 are more intimate than those in their 30’s. So stop cringing at the thought of your parents. Stop rolling your eyes when they kiss. Stop gagging when you see an old couple groping each other. We all have physical desires, age rarely hinders that. So go, be kinky, send your mother a catalog and say thanks for being in love.
As always, I love who I am, I love what I do, and I love the products I get to share with all of you. I am Liona Sun, Full Bloom Parties Blogger and until next time, be cool, stay safe and practice your own KINK and Sexy.
I hope you enjoy, like, comment, and keep in touch with all the up-coming blogs. Ladies, if you’d like to be interviewed for your own KINK and Sexy article, be sure to message me either through social media or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org and we’ll set up an interview!
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